Every few years my birthday lands on Mother’s Day. I decided long ago that if I have kids I will tell them that we celebrate Mother’s Day in March like they do in the UK. Give those children some culture, am I right? Space out those gift-receiving holidays! I’ve always been kinda bummed about sharing “my day” but this year, my mom was really there for me when I needed someone so I’m more than happy to share today with her.
I’m really lucky to have a great relationship with both of my parents, and over the past few years have gotten to be really close with my mom. I tell her everything and consider her to be one of my best friends. If fifteen-year-old me could read this post she’d be rolling her eyes and saying “whatever” under her breath. And then Mom would snap, “If you don’t be careful, your eyes are going to be stuck like that!”. But trust me, fifteen-year-old Adrianna, it’ll happen and you’ll be so thankful.
In honour of Mother’s Day, today’s post is going to be three lessons I learned from my mom. Now obviously my mom has taught me a lot over the years (you know, with the whole raising me thing) but instead of listing everything from how to read, how to sew, and that the funny looking plastic thing we keep in the pantry clips onto the Kitchenaid Mixer to keep the flour from flying everywhere… I’ll stick to some more abstract but heartfelt lessons.
- To have a sense of humour. Okay, if you were my friend in elementary school this one might be hard to imagine. Everyone was scared of my mom, myself included, for many years. But then when I was a couple years into high school, things changed. I remember the day. My two best friends were visiting and we were sitting on my mom’s bed just shit-talking and full out belly laughing. The girls that once were scared to come over to face my mom kept saying how awesome she was and how much they love her. Now they consider her a second mother and them, her other daughters. At the end of 2015, we found out the reason my mom had been losing most of her eyesight was because she had a brain tumour. We then found out she had four parathyroid tumours as well. As devastating as this was, she faced it with grace and the most incredible sense of humour. While jokes about serious surgeries, brain tumours, and going blind might seem distasteful… there was a lot more laughter in our house than tears. I’m so proud of my mom and she is one of the strongest people I know.
- Give, even when you don’t get. My mom and I are very alike in a few ways. One of the most notable is that we are very creative people and our strengths lay on that side of things. The other is we are die-hard people pleasers to the point where it can be detrimental. We have both been in situations where we do our best and give all of ourselves to people who really don’t appreciate it or won’t reciprocate when we need them. Even though we have been burned more times than we can help, we don’t let it change who we are and we both still go out of our way to make the people in our life happy!
- “Everyone comes into your life for either a reason, a season, or a lifetime”. My mom said this to me in grade twelve when I was upset about a bunch of friendships that weren’t as strong or true as I thought they were. I sat beside her on the couch crying and she said the quote to me and it changed the way I look at relationships. Over the years I’ve had a lot of “best friends” that lasted a couple years and then our friendship ended for whatever reason. But looking back, I can say… okay yes, that friendship served this purpose, or that friendship was perfect for that period of my life. I am lucky to have three best friends who I know will be “lifetime” friendships, and as much as I am hopeful to find others that will fall into that category it is helpful to know that it’s okay if people you once considered your BFF’s aren’t really forever.
If you would like to see the post I wrote last year for Mother’s Day, it’s HERE. It features a video that I’m pretty proud of (my Mother’s Day present from 2010) and never fails to get my mom reaching for the Kleenex.
What are some of the most important lessons your mom (or other maternal figure) taught you? Happy Mother’s Day to all the mom’s out there! Thanks, as always, for reading today’s post!